Does anyone else feel like an orange in a juicer?

I do. Today hasn't been a 'bad' day, per se. It feels more like a 'chasing after the wind' day. I've been feeling a little crushed by the prospect of not amounting to much. I feel squished and all of my mojo has been drained, like a proverbial Austin Powers.

Adventure seems so far away, and all of the great things I aspire to don't even seem to appear on the horizon, they seem to have moved beyond it. I don't need to accomplish much, and I don't want glory. I don't need to be the best at something, or that anyone ever know about anything I do. But I do need, for my sake, to live a life that is adventurous. And right now I feel like a pet chinchilla. And anyone who's ever had, known someone who had, or is familiar in any way with pet chinchillas knows that they are fairly useless creatures and are kept sealed up in cages most of the time.

I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining. I just wonder sometimes if the career and life choices I've made are converging on a path that is very flat and well-trodden. I don't want to just live until I get old and die. I want to.... fight a bear to the death! I want to fly a helicopter. I want to dig wells in small African towns. I want my children to grow up in a country where I don't have permanent citizenship. I don't want fast food or TV or the American Dream.

Maybe I'm just tired. I did stay up late last night...